need to feel loved

I know im such a needy slave.. but what can he expect. Master found me on Craigslist. He made me so sad when he said he was just browsing for asians to hook up w. It makes me feel not so special. We made love last night:> it was wonderful. I'm a good girl but when were making love I love to be naughty. It makes me sad how I'm always hungy. I never eat around because he makes me feel fat. I've been here Almost a week and I haven't eaten a normal meal. He is always criticizing me and hurting my feelings. I wish I could eat. I'm starving and I'm so sad.

master makes me sad

I know I have insecurities but master makes them come out way more. I weigh 114 lbs. I'm 5 ft 3in. He tells me to work out all the time and how much better I would look if I did this and this workout. He talks about other girls being hot and it breaks my heart. I never say or do anything of the sort to him. I'm so dedicated to my master. When guys come up to me at the gym I always think my master is way more sexier and buffer and more beautiful. My heart aches. I watched him stare at another girl dancing while I'm in the background so sad..

cleaning day

Master went to work. He's been so stressed lately. It makes me feel like I'm the one causing the problems. Today I will clean masters room.:> hopefully it will make him happy.

anal beads

Master and I hit our five month Anniversary march 16! It will soon be six months then a year then forever! We have our UPS n our downs. Yesterday was one of our downs. I wanted to leave him and get on a train back to oc. We worked things out. I really need to get passed my insecurities but I really don't know how. My sex addiction is not as much as a problem anymore. Sex has been better lately. It's more passionate which I'm loving. I don't want to seem blind but I think we are really falling for eachother. Last week master put four anal beads in up my bottom! I loved every bead of it! Then he cleaned it off and put the beads in my kitty kat down there! Yesterday we had sexies twice and both times it ended in anal. Yay! Sunday when we had sexies at my parents house we were on exstacy! It was so sensual and tingly. It was amazing. I love making love with my master.. sigh...<3

on my way

.. to Masters on a train to san diego. Things are perfect! He loves me so much. I fantasized that we were playing naughty spanking games. :>