taking it slow

I'm trying to detach from master. He says he cares and loves me but sometimes its hard to believe him. He is weally flip floppy about everything he says and does. I can't trust a person let alone my master like that. Hopefully he will get better. I see myself leaving him if he doesn't shapes ups... I'm a sweet girl.. I'm super kinky and freaky but that doesn't make me a bad person. For a kinkster I'm still pretty innocent. My feelings are true, sincere, and genuine for master. I want the same for me... Mew kitty sad.

master doesnt love me anymore..

All I can do is show Michael how much I care by giving him unconditional love. It doesn't seem to be enough. He doesn't want to meet my family for Christmas. He says its too much too fast.. all I can do is give him his space.. I've never thought it could hurt so much for master to say he needs time away from eachother..

under cover

Master has business in la this week. He had to drive his company van so he doesn't have his car. I had to pick him up at the la police station because something about the servers were not working. When I picked him up he said baby I need to tell you something.. I'm am undercover cop. And I said Omg no way I totally knew it! Then he said just kidding. Now I don't know what to believe.. I feel like he is.

slave needs attention

A photographer contacted me today asking if he could work with me. Michael hasn't weally paid any attention to me today. He said he just got off the phone with his friend telling her that I'm a beast in bed and sex is great. That's funny because we never have enough sex to ever satisfy my needs. Ha! Little does master know how much is weally lacking in our relationship. He feels satisfied sexually I guess but for me its the complete opposite. He spanked me barely with his leather belt. It wasn't even a warm up beating. Sigh... I need more attention. Slaves need attention especially this one.

honey buns of steel

Last night master called me after hanging out with his friends and said for me to come over. I called his bluff and I drove to san Diego from oc. Master doesn't like me talking to clients anymore. It's not much of a sacrifice. Something I've always wanted since I've worked as a slave at the dungeon is for someone to come along and take me away from it all. I weally want someone to care enough to make me leave the dungeon scene. I like having it as a hobby to rebel against my parents but if I had someone that cared it completely changes everything. Master is that guy! He considers it cheating. Michael doesn't like me being perverted. I told him I was made this way. I can try and be normal... we call it vanilla.

master is amazing!

Things between master and I are perfect! He is in la for the week which means I'm home in oc!! I was so lonely in san Diego while master was away at work. We will be spending new years together! Hope we see fire works! I love master more and more as the days go by. I hope it is the same for him. Love between a slave and a master is berry strong!!! Sigh...